New Things

Life update!→

I still have the same job and soon it'll be a whole year since i've had it!  I've only ever had one other job that I had for a year, and even that was mostly 1 to 2 days a week :/

Also booked tickets to go for a long vacation overseas! woot!

And recently started classes for a short course in fashion.  It's pretty interesting, very casual, and kind of only really worth it of you do lots of the assigned work on your own effort.  It's one full day a week, and  in an interesting place by the city.   You get given homework but it's not checked.  Only if  you show it to the teacher who will give you feedback.  So, like, if you really wanna get good, you gotta do it on your own terms, which I guess is realistic and good if you wanna make it from scratch in any industry.  The thing is last weeks homework, I spent 10 hours on it, and I reckon i'll spend more on this weeks.

͓

+picture of Helen Mitchell

Ummm

I have Schizoid PD.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Well, fuck.

2016 so far, It's May

International May Day today!  A lady on the street gave me a flyer about U.S. war tactics, and a rally against it.  I would of gone but I'm a loner when it comes to these things.  I know people either completely uninterested, or so informed and obsessed in the subject. It's tough, sometimes, being in that middle area. (lol)  But I wanna know, is the Philippines really being used for the u.s. to get at China? and if yes, how exactly? hmmmmmmmmmm.

Anyways, It's basically the middle of the year and I'm still like at the start.  Not much has happened, but I just know from history it's gonna get rocky in the next half of the year.
weeny bits of 2016 so far in dotpoints:

Madly searching for a ft job
Haven't found a decent ft job
Been rejected in so many ways
Earned some decent money
used all my money
still in debt
crushed on a guy
stayed off fb for a decent while
finally hardly ever use fb
cut my hair the shortest I ever have in my grown up life
found more new music from people I've listened to for forever
made my hair bluish green, like teal. yay!
read harry potter (I'm halfway)
watched so much youtube for the first time in my life
did door sales for more than the training period
got into tele sales
got into evaluation for a fucking awesome company and flopped
got hired then my department cancelled before me earning money
cried to a random woman after she told me her abuse story
had real 'I should die' thoughts for the first time ever
kissed a u.s. army guy for helping me instead of giving him a feminist fyi.
started a new label project that will be for the future
cried for an old friends mother
started volunteering
still getting fatter

Visiting Cebu

After being in a smaller city for so long, I felt like a country girl experiencing the metropolis for the first time.  I guess I've also spent most of my life in a smaller city mostly made up of suburbia. It was more exciting than I thought it would be mostly because the place was bigger than I ever thought.  All I knew was that the city was on a smaller island and there were more tourists and resorts.  I had no idea the whole place was actually more than a few densely populated 'cities' side by side.

I'm glad also that I didn't do much research before I went.  It was a very spontaneous trip, with only 1 page worth of notes to prep myself for.  One rainy day I simply voiced my thoughts to my Mum and everyone there that I wanted to visit Cebu.  Main reason was my Mum had experiences there and her stories are always interesting.  Another important reason is her mum, my Lola, originated from there. And me always hungry for family history like I am for old or vintage things, just wanted to walk in the place and get a feel for the place. 

So I voiced my thoughts and my Mum told me how to get there like it was no big deal.  My sister etc actually went before me so they could trip around other places first.  I went a week later so I could help my Mum with some things first.  But I still didn't do much research.  I didn't even know completely the details of getting there, and my Mum just let me put my trust into the casualness of wonderful Philippines transportation.  And meeting up with the other didn't go quite as planned.  I deeeesperately wanted to take the boat, but I couldn't get enough information and so ended up flying.

The experience of getting there I think was also more interesting than I thought it would be. I woke up early, missed the first schedule, got really sick, got candy from a stranger haha, ate alone and TOOK ONLY ONE BITE of DELICIOUSSS FRIED CHICKEN :((((.  I went over mountains and farms, and saw so many little villages and trees I've never seen before, tried to navigate myself in a town I knew nothing about. I didn't even know how to say the name properly.  Talked to some old high rich ladies and plasticlovers, and attempted going into a roof because I saw a rusty old ladder and was tempted. After I met up with the rest we found a hotel, where the receptionist ended up taking us to another location closeby, and it felt like we were the only guests there.  But even though it was a town we didn't know anything about, we still kind of felt at home and were able to easily find food and go shopping etc.

After a one hour flight we went straight to shopping again haha!  Then we looked for good affordable accomodation.  The downside to not planning a trip; it becomes more expensive and a little rougher, but still this keeps it interesting.  We looked at a small hotel that was fancy inside but somehow dodgy on the outside.  We took a crazy taxi drive that gave me a feel for how big the place was, because the driver was really fast on a straight road, and it still took a while to get to out destination.  He told us interesting stories about the hotels, and it's owners and all the bloody drama around it.  For the whole ride I was nervous as fuck and hoping my paranoid thoughts wouldn't become true.  But we got to the hotel and it was awesome!  It was kinds funny we stepped out and there was a late night starbucks right there. 

The hotel was one of those fancy 4-5 stars that you know still has shady shit going on.  But anyways, on to our favourite thing.  We saw the price and decided no, but we still were shown the best and highest room, and told all the fancy features which were actually more interesting than most nice hotels I've been in.  So we moved on.  I checked out the streets and it was more interesting than I thought, like more lively (first paragraph).   We ended up in some dark honestly shady industrial area.  We walked into 'hourly' motels, and even though we figured it out eventually, we still checked out the rooms hahaha!!!.  We then decided to go to 'that nicer looking high building over there', and actually found decent accommodation, right across from more 'hourly' motels, and 'clubs'.

This first night we just chilled and crashed.  The next day I got up earlier than the rest like usual and checked out the close 'view' across the road.  Again, interesting, but the whole picture including the horizon was actually quite beautiful.  The hotel was a bit empty so I decided to 'tour' it alone.  I walked up all the steps to the top, and went in some rooms I probably shouldn't have.  Something inside me was sooo happy and satisfied. The hotel was quiet, with the city hum in the distance, the industrial views, the early morning sun and cool air.  I got so excited I walked around more, found a window and clumb out onto a warehouse roof and saw the city sprawling along with the mountains to the horizon.  Then I got back in and sung my heart out in an empty function room with old windows framing the view of shipping docks and the sea.

Anyways I was there for like 4 days, I forgot.  Different hotel every night.
On the second last night we were supposed to leave but the plane cost half price if it wasn't last minute, so we bought tickets for the next day and stayed an extra night.

I ended up typing more than I planned to, but I think I'll even add extra later.  Right now I'm distracted and need to do something else omg.

how long has it been ???

I'm listening to Kings of Leon songs again,

then I looked at the dates and was surprised when I realised it was 8 years ago that I first hear them!

I was in the middle of high school. So much has happened since then.

I clearly remember Kings of Leon being very popular at that time here, and I absolutely loved 'Revelry'!  Ofcourse I would, listen to it and it's like you could so easily drift off into a dream.

2016 New Year's resolution???

I spent New Years in asia town.

I couldn't be bothered with a NY resolution last year, because I was actually feeling quite okay, happy with myself, etc.  I thought I'd just let things be.  It ended up being one of my calmer years, maybe even the calmest.  Probably because I was less involved with other people's shit, and spent more time on myself.
I also became more aware of myself without doing any soul searching on purpose.  I became even more comfortable, but i still got a few more trials to get through.  I realised so many other people just don't care or think the way i do, even though they say such things.  I became more understanding of other people, but i also learnt to not deal with other people's bullshitiness.
My interests also changed a lot.  I've made long term plans in the past but they've gone through so many changes.

Now I decided i should go with a resolution this year, just to see if i can achieve it.
So here is some things i'd like to do:

Be more artsy: more time drawing and actually try to paint well and do a good canvas artwork. I got to experiment more to improve.
&
Backpack and travel! for a decent amount of time.  Over a month all together would be great. Hopefully I can find a place to stay in and explore for a three month period!  I'm thinking a week in New Zealand, and a week in Japan.  Maybe even go to Spain.

Things that were in 2015

Things I can remember I did in 2015:

Joined over 5 protests
stormed City Hall
cut my hair the shortests it's been since i was 5
graduated university
began spanish
went to byron bay for semester break
stayed in a hostel
stayed in  a huge TP for a night
saw hockey dad twice
week trip to butuan/Cebu
went through mindano on a bus alone
became more aware and happier about myself
got a new computer
worked at the ekka
worked in  a themed food van
more into casual simple fashion
unhappily spent 500 on j-fash
used a cat calendar - only cat thing in my room
interest in america and backpacking born
tweeted a lot
deactivated fb
lost interest in japan and japanese
stayed up all night in the city in  a net cafe
drank a lot but stayed in moderation 95% of the time
began hanging out with guys only
affirmed idgaf about gender
tried street fundraising
made a real friend that i stayed in contact with out of uni
made plans and actually met with a friend from HS
only went to one convention
first time not going to conventions in my city
kissed a girl, no open mouth but still counts
traveled nearly 2 hours to get to another campus
hang gliding and steered myself
kissed 5 guys in one night
in a club with a bunch of randos till 3am
spent so much time playing games
so emotionally invested in LiS
fell in love with everyone in mgsv TPP
made my own dress for a ball
went into crazy legal battle involving rent property
existed by myself for a while
lived like a swagman
made my own fires
dieted like crazy
used an  air bed and floated a kilometre down the bay to another house
cared for 3 kittens for like a month
no new year resolution but i think it was the calmest year

maybe i should make a resolution for this year...